I didn’t know I was coveted I didn’t know it would feel so uncomfortable Moving to this new place Where my race made me a face on every guy’s favourite magazine Forcefully, without my own choice You see, I was an Italian man’s dream it seemed But his dream - was my nightmare Something I fear to share even with myself Because it’s still there The discomfort Like a lump in my throat Attention is what I craved Yet what I wanted most Ended up feeling like I was locked in a cave An animal whom people guffawed at Smiled at Took photos of Noticed a bit too much Was I being difficult? Was I asking for too much? Were my cries for them to be blind To me, my skin, my colour A sin? I didn’t know. I went there blindsided Hurt by the truth But moreso confused Was I the newest gelato flavour? Was I their new ‘muse’? I didn’t know. Was this always the case? Was my presence always too overwhelming to face? I didn’t know. Honest to God, I didn’t. I wish I never did I wish I remained in my bliss Ignorance - that is.