I didnāt know I was covetedĀ
I didnāt know it would feel so uncomfortableĀ
Moving to this new placeĀ
Where my race made me a faceĀ
on every guyās favourite magazine
Forcefully, without my own choiceĀ
You see,
I was an Italian manās dream it seemedĀ
But his dream - was my nightmareĀ
Something I fear to share even with myselfĀ
Because itās still thereĀ
The discomfortĀ
Like a lump in my throatĀ
Attention is what I cravedĀ
Yet what I wanted most
Ended up feeling like I was locked in a caveĀ
An animal whom people guffawed at
Smiled at
Took photos ofĀ
Noticed a bit too muchĀ
Was I being difficult?Ā
Was I asking for too much?Ā
Were my cries for them to be blindĀ
To me, my skin, my colourĀ
A sin?Ā
I didnāt know.Ā
I went there blindsidedĀ
Hurt by the truthĀ
But moreso confusedĀ
Was I the newest gelato flavour?
Was I their new āmuseā?Ā
I didnāt know.Ā
Was this always the case?Ā
Was my presence always too overwhelming to face?Ā
I didnāt know.Ā
Honest to God, I didnāt.Ā
I wish I never didĀ
I wish I remained in my bliss
Ignorance - that is.