IDK.

I didnā€™t know I was covetedĀ 
I didnā€™t know it would feel so uncomfortableĀ 
Moving to this new placeĀ 
Where my race made me a faceĀ 
on every guyā€™s favourite magazine
Forcefully, without my own choiceĀ 

You see,

I was an Italian manā€™s dream it seemedĀ 
But his dream - was my nightmareĀ 
Something I fear to share even with myselfĀ 
Because itā€™s still thereĀ 
The discomfortĀ 
Like a lump in my throatĀ 

Attention is what I cravedĀ 
Yet what I wanted most
Ended up feeling like I was locked in a caveĀ 
An animal whom people guffawed at
Smiled at
Took photos ofĀ 
Noticed a bit too muchĀ 

Was I being difficult?Ā 
Was I asking for too much?Ā 
Were my cries for them to be blindĀ 
To me, my skin, my colourĀ 
A sin?Ā 

I didnā€™t know.Ā 

I went there blindsidedĀ 
Hurt by the truthĀ 
But moreso confusedĀ 
Was I the newest gelato flavour?
Was I their new ā€˜museā€™?Ā 

I didnā€™t know.Ā 

Was this always the case?Ā 
Was my presence always too overwhelming to face?Ā 

I didnā€™t know.Ā 
Honest to God, I didnā€™t.Ā 

I wish I never didĀ 
I wish I remained in my bliss
Ignorance - that is.

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